Orange County Pastor: You Can Only Manage 150 Friends At A Time

You Can Only Manage 150 Friends At A Time

Seth Godin posted on his blog today about "Dunbar's number."

Here is what Seth writes,

"Dunbar's number is 150.
And he's not compromising, no matter how much you whine about it.
Dunbar postulated that the typical human being can only have 150 friends. One hundred fifty people in the tribe. After that, we just aren't cognitively organized to handle and track new people easily. That's why, without external forces, human tribes tend to split in two after they reach this size. It's why WL Gore limits the size of their offices to 150 (when they grow, they build a whole new building)."

What are your thoughts on this theory?
How does this impact our Church's?
Should Church's plant new Churches when they grow to be over 150 people?
Does our Facebook and Twitters obsession with friend numbers fly in the face of this theory?

These are some of the questions I am thinking through tonight.
(and the fact that I made several errors, got picked off 2nd base and contributed to our team's loss in men's league softball tonight...sad)

3 comments:

AnnaOct 27, 2009 01:25 AM
I don't even think that I could manage 150 friends. I have enough trouble keeping the few I have. And while capping a church seems a good thought at first, I don't know if what we really need are more churches - but I do understand the sentiment. It's difficult to be authentic with so many people. Church goes can easily get lost, intentionally or unintentionally. I think it speaks to the whole value we have in LifeGroups, (which would be insane if they ever hit 150 in a group.) Don't make a new church, just become committed to a group of growing fellow believers, and stick with it. On a given Sunday I can either feel overwhelmed by how many people I know, or look around and wonder where anyone I’m friends with is. Having that core group from our YA LifeGroup there makes all the difference in making me feel connected.
ReplyDelete
AnonymousOct 27, 2009 05:48 AM
I don't have much to say other than...I wish I had 150 friends ;)

Here is some info you might find useful regarding this topic and ministries of the church. If you want to super-size your thinking there is more on the site if you look for the Megachurch topic on the left.

Ryan
ReplyDelete
Tom BaileyOct 27, 2009 06:50 AM
I think this really depends on how well you manage your time. I have some friends on the east coast and I call them early in the AM. I have some friends that I send emails to, some I call once or twice a month on Sunday afternoons to stay in touch.

I think it really comes down to time management and how you define a friend. If you define it by "could I call this person at 2 AM if I was in a jam?" Having 150 is more than anyone I know. If a person goes through their cell phone with the can I call this person at 2 AM question that can give clarity on how many deep friendships you have.

The other way I have heard friend defined is doing at least 3 outside of business activities with them. As a pastor you can hit that number easy depending on how you define it.

I like your blog and like your ideas. I am not part of your church but do listen to your churches radio station.
ReplyDelete

Add comment